Tuesday, November 25, 2014-
I go to work as normal. I am swollen and miserable. It is painful to walk, it is painful to sit. I complain to anyone that will listen. I am 26 weeks and 6 days pregnant. I thought to myself several times, "Goodness, if I am this miserable now, what will the next 13 weeks bring?" In my heart I knew something wasn't right. I had gained 17 pounds in just one week. How was that even possible for someone to do? I mentioned to some coworkers that I had a feeling Annie would come early. By "early" I was thinking a couple of weeks. I had no idea what was in store.
3:15 pm- I had my glucose test and routine appointment with my OB (Dr. Gernt) scheduled for 3:15 pm that day. I left work and arrived at my appointment on time. I did the normal "pee in a cup, stand on the scale, drink this sugar drink". I went to the waiting room to ingest the glucose drink. I was given 5 minutes to do so. I sat down and looked at my phone to start timing myself. Ready, Set, Go. I chugged as quickly as I could. I was close to being finished when a nurse called my name. I looked at my phone, only 3 minutes had passed. I told my nurse that I hadn't been given enough time. She said it was ok, and she took my unfinished drink and escorted me to the exam room. Another nurse (Dr. Gernt's nurse) followed me into the room and told me to sit down. She asked me, "Are you feeling ok?" I immediately knew something was wrong. There was a lump in my throat. I told her I felt very swollen and uncomfortable. She took my blood pressure. It was 190/100. She said Dr. Gernt would be with me in a moment.
It was less than a minute. Dr. Gernt came in and told me that I was very sick. There was a very large amount of protein in my urine and that my kidneys and liver were not functioning properly. She said I needed to go straight to Cookeville Hospital where they would give me a steroid shot for Annie's lungs. "A steroid shot? What does that mean?", I asked. Dr. Gernt (in the nicest and calmest way possible) told me that there was a chance that I would need to deliver Annie soon. Those were the words that changed everything. I was alone. She told me to call Brandon. He answered but I could barely speak. "Get to the hospital" was about all I could get out. He hung up. I stood up, hugged Dr. Gernt, and walked out. What in the world was happening? I got into my car and drove across the street to the hospital. I parked and I called my mom and grandmother. They had Owen and I wanted to make sure he was ok. Brandon pulled in and we walked silently into the hospital. I started shaking uncontrollably. I could barely speak because of the nerves. Brandon's parents (MawMaw and PawPaw) picked Owen up at my grandmother's house and took him back to Nashville. Our incredibly long and emotional journey was about to begin.
4 pm- This is where things started to happen at lighting speed. I was hooked to monitors, poked, stuck, my face was covered and pads were put around me due to a possible seizure. A catheter was put in place. Amnionic fluid tests were done. There was no talking and no lights. Dr. Pippin (who was on call at Cookeville Hospital) came into the room. I heard him say "preeclampsia". They gave me a steroid shot and started a drug called Magnesium which is an anti-seizure, blood pressure, and muscle relaxing medicine. I could feel it coursing through me. It was awful. It was hot. I was dizzy. I asked Dr. Pippin when he though I could go home. (Thinking once my blood pressure was under control I could leave) He said "You aren't leaving the hospital until you deliver this baby. That could be tonight, tomorrow, or 3 weeks from now, but you aren't going anywhere. You are very sick." That was it. The verdict was made. I was stuck. I was told that I would be transported to Vanderbilt Medical Center that night because Cookeville was not equipped to take care of micro preemies. Micro preemies? My heart was breaking, I didn't know if my baby daughter was going to be ok. I could hear her heart beating on the monitor, but for how long?
11pm- The ambulance arrives to transport me to Vandy. I tell my mom, grandmother, and Brandon goodbye. I would see them in a hour or so. The EMT guy that sat in the back with me was very nice. He turned up the music (a little Taylor Swift) and talked to me about everything. I could hear the sirens and see the lights, but he kept me calm. We arrived at Vanderbilt in 45 minutes. I was in a room almost instantly. My support team (mom, grandmother, and Brandon) weren't far behind.
Wednesday, November 26, 2014
12:30 am- The nurses came in and hooked me up to their monitors. I was poked and stuck several more times. I was still dizzy and starting to feel disoriented due to the magnesium drip. A doctor came in and did an ultrasound. I was tired. I was hungry (no eating while on magnesium). I was worried. The doctor said that Annie looked good. The goal was to get me to 30 weeks. (I was 27 weeks) "Babies do a lot better when they are born after 30 weeks". 21 days. I could do that. Annie could stay inside of me, I would be monitored, and I would have extended bed rest. I would miss Owen terribly but he could visit. I started to come to terms with the idea. I fell asleep and so did the rest of my support team (well-as much sleep as they could get).
Early the next morning- Dr. McWheeny came in to assess me. He asked me questions that I can't remember. He drew labs. He began trying to prepare me for a delivery that, in his opinion, was going to happen sooner rather than later. "What about getting to 30 weeks?" Unfortunately my body was getting sicker by the hour. Things were not resolving. I was in and out of consciousness. I remember not being able to open my eyes. I couldn't move. I could only listen. I heard the doctors talking to Brandon, but I couldn't comprehend what was happening.
9am- An ultrasound tech came into do an extensive look at Annie. It lasted for a very long time. She looked at every inch of her. It was determined that she weighed a little more that 2 pounds and was above the 50th percentile for her gestational age. I was told that babies delivered at 27 weeks had a 90% chance of survival. I was told that I was starting to have partial placenta abruption. My body was trying to get rid of this pregnancy. Little did I know, my body was trying to survive. I received another steroid shot to prepare Annie's tiny premature lungs.
The very last ultrasound pic I got of my little girl.
11am- The doctors were in and out of my room. I was unable to make sense of very much. I do know that at this point Brandon knew that I would be delivering that day. He was told that Annie was ok at the moment. My sickness was not effecting her…yet. However, with every passing minute, I was a ticking time bomb. She would be better off out than in. I would only be "cured" if the baby was delivered. When the official call was made, I'm not sure. I don't think that I was aware of the decision yet. The rest of my family was called (Paulette, Becky, and my dad). I know they rushed to get there because my room was full pretty quickly.
I didn't want to share this picture at first. This is the worst I've ever looked. However, I wanted to remember the severity of the situation, how swollen I was, and how terrible I felt.
1 pm- The doctors came in and surrounded me. I opened my eyes and tried to answer their questions. "How was my vision?" Completely blurry. I was unable to focus on much. I felt like I was in a tunnel. "Did my stomach hurt?" I was feeling ok until they started poking. It was tender. The doctor looked at me and said something that I retained very well. "Caitlin, we are going to have a baby today." I stayed calm. I digested it. The doctors left the room. Silence. I broke down. I was heart broken and I felt so guilty. I was scared. I was scared for my sweet Annie. I was scared for myself. I was scared for our family. I was scared for Brandon and Owen… But this was it- It was Annie's birthday.
2:30 pm- It was time. I said bye to my family. Brandon said he would see me in a few. They wheeled me to the operating room to give me a spinal and prepare me for the procedure. I remember the lights. I remember the spinal injection. I remember feeling sick. I tried to stay awake, but I felt absolutely terrible. This is the worst I hope I ever feel for the rest of my life.
Brandon came in and I woke up. It all happened so fast. I could feel pressure and tugging, I wanted to vomit, I was so scared. Then I heard the doctor say, "Good Morning Annie!" and I heard her tiny cry. They said she was beautiful. They said she was moving and kicking. They said she was ok. I was so relieved. I fell back asleep. I did not see her, however Brandon got to take a few quick pictures. She was tiny, she was gorgeous, she was ours.
Annie's first picture in this world- born at 3:08 pm.
My tiny 2 pound 5 ounce daughter born at just 27 weeks- 13 weeks early.
One thing is for sure, I will never be the same. This experience taught me how short and unpredictable life is. It showed me the good in people. It showed me what love really is. It doesn't matter what plans we have for ourselves. God is the one in control.
One thing is for sure, I will never be the same. This experience taught me how short and unpredictable life is. It showed me the good in people. It showed me what love really is. It doesn't matter what plans we have for ourselves. God is the one in control.
Annie, While it was not the day that either of us expected, it was a miracle just the same. There were angels watching over both of us. You are a fighter. You are strong. You are my girl. I love you forever.
-Mommy
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